The joy of being yourself
LGBTQ+ activist and author Philippa Ryder speaks to Caitrina Cody about workplace diversity and finding the freedom to live your life the way you want to.
Philippa Ryder’s memoir was launched last October and is published by Mercier Press.
Philippa sounds relaxed when she answers her phone, fresh from a riverside walk in the south Dublin suburb of Templeogue. “My wife and I go out for a walk pretty much every day; there’s a coffeeshop run by the local GAA [Gaelic Athletic Association club] so it’s perfect. I can’t operate unless I get some air, so we get out early and then I come back to do some work.”
It’s no surprise Philippa, who transitioned from male to female about 12 years ago, needs some headspace. It’s been a busy couple of years for the former digital mapping expert, with the launch of her memoir, My Name is Philippa, last autumn and the expansion of her work as a diversity coach. We’ve caught up with her on the first day of June; as a director of Dublin Pride, it’s one of the busiest months of her year.
“I feel like it’s important to be visible if you’re comfortable with it, that you interact. There’s no onus on anyone to be public, but I’m very lucky in that I had a successful career and I had a very good transition from male to female so I feel it’s my duty to give back—to talk to the media, educate them and inform them on the reasons behind Pride. The day of Pride itself is going to be insanely busy.”
It’s a jam-packed month too for Under the Rainbow, the coaching and counselling service Philippa founded with her colleagues Gillian and Dermot in 2019. “We were getting so many requests for talks as individuals that it made sense to set up an office together to act as a base for the business. We work with companies on all kinds of mental health and diversity issues, not just LGBTQ+, to help them create diversity policies and give talks to staff… we are busiest by far in the month of June.”
Philippa sounds like she’s only half joking when she says she’s looking forward to July 1. “We encourage companies to look at the bigger picture year-round, rather than just in June. If they want to employ us to give talks on any element of diversity we’re around, but we’d almost like them to do it in any month but June—there’s already so much going on!”
Philippa with her Under the Rainbow co-founders, Gillian Fagan and Dermot McCarthy
As a content agency, ALHAUS helps clients to make online content more accessible and inclusive; Philippa and her colleagues do similar work with corporations and charities on workplace diversity. “Inclusion, equity and diversity are hot topics at the moment—especially neuro-diversity, the concept of understanding that people have different ways of looking at things. We want to delve deeper into language and terminology; one of the things our clients always ask about is the terminology and how not to offend someone.”
She’s conscious that diversity can be an intimidating area for business owners who are scared of getting it wrong. “Terminology changes almost on a daily basis—even the rainbow flag has changed a lot since the inception. The Transgender Equality Network Ireland (TENI) does a lot of work on terminology… but as long as you’re being responsible, polite and inclusive you’re ok and if you do make an error—just apologise! Sometimes I get pronouns wrong because I’m not entirely sure, so the best thing to do is ask. To really understand people, just ask questions.”
The experience of writing and launching her book, My Name is Philippa, was truly cathartic, she explains. “I was really worried there might be negativity once it was published but I was delighted with the response and the reviews. People were surprised by just how open I was but I have always found that by being open, you get people to understand and appreciate what you’re going through. Keeping things hidden can eat you up inside… I needed to do this book for myself, so that I could get over that part of my life and move on.”
For Philippa, Pride in 2022 is about recognising that there are still so many challenges facing LGBTQ+ communities around the world. “When it comes down to it, all anyone in my community wants is just to be ourselves and live our lives. Everybody else has bills to pay and mortgages, but we also have this part of ourselves that is so important that we can’t live while we deny it. It’s really difficult to get that across to people who think it’s a lifestyle choice. Everybody thinks ‘Ah sure, the gays have everything now, they have gender equality and marriage rights.’ But look at the murders in Sligo, the recent attacks on Dublin streets—there is still a lot of work to do on getting people to be more accepting.”
Her advice to business owners seeking to become better LGBTQ+ allies in Pride month—and across the rest of the year? “When setting up a LGBTQ+ sub-committee or programme, it’s so important that it comes from management but also from staff themselves and that they meet in the middle. That’s how it worked for me—I was chair of my organisation’s LGBTQ+ group and while we got great support from management, we also gained loads of allies from within the office. That was so inspiring to me and to some of my other LGBTQ+ friends, it really made our days at work so much better.”